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Rockstar Review

I am writing this review because nobody asked me to write one. Whenever I watch a movie, I spend some time dissecting the logic: the crux of what the movie is all about. The lesson from this movie is “Don’t fuck sick girls and make them pregnant; they go into coma if you do that!” simple.  I seriously didn’t know this logic before watching this movie. So, in future whenever I am about to proceed, I would definitely pop this question to the girl “are you sick?” instead of “Are you ready?”. Because you don’t want to see a girl in coma when you get up in the morning; you will be like “Coma?!!, seriously?, WTF, I was not that rough yesterday night “.

Of course there are also some less important lessons to be learnt from this movie like: just fuck around if you really like a girl, it doesn’t matter if she is happily married to a decent family guy. The thing is, if you love somebody just proceed no matter what. It’s a marvelous lesson. Marriage is about trust and love is about lust. A match between lust and trust is like a match between Federer and Tsonga in yesterdays Paris open finals. The lust will rape trust no matter what.

India right now needs directors like Imtiaz ali. I am serious. Here is a director who teaches us the essence of life. In his first movie, Jab we met, he taught us how to run away from a marriage, in his second movie; Love aaj Kal, he taught us how to lead a decent no strings attached live in relationship; in his third movie he went a step ahead and taught us the beauty of an extra marital affair. I believe it’s a divine intervention that directors like Imtiaz ali are able to make decent movies which we really like and adore, hats off to him, hats off.

Coming back to the movie, what fascinated me is the character of JJ aka Jordan. Every Indian girl loves to have a BF like him.  There was a time in my life where I came to a conclusion that 2 organs are a must for a man to impress an Indian girl, one is the physical organ and the other is a Guitar.  JJ has everything. He is innocent (choooo cute), he is a guitarist, singer, virgin, what not. It’s as if God interviewed all dead Indian chicks and made a prototype in the name of JJ. I envy him. But there is a flaw in the movie. JJ eventually becomes a Rockstar and here is the catch, he doesn’t fuck girls because he loves a sick girl. Sensible thing for any man to do when he becomes a rock star is to exploit those crazy girls who run for his autograph. If I ever become a rock star, and if chicks are drooling over me, what do you expect me to do, commoonnn. JJ won’t even think about other girls. That’s the reason why all the girls who came out of the theatre yesterday are mesmerized by Ranbir Kapoor and cursed that poor hot chick, Nargis Fakhri, just because she can’t act and i condemn this.

I think this is the first time in my life I spent more time watching a girl’s lips than her breasts and back. Nargis Fakhri made this impossible thing possible. In my opinion it’s a great achievement for an actress. I loved her.

Overall, this movie was a spiritual journey for me. It changed me, taught me soo many things, explained the beauty of lust and I thank Ali for giving me this wonderful opportunity. Thank you Ali, thank you. My next stop is another spiritual movie “The Dirty picture”, eagerly waiting for another earth shattering experience.



About Straight Post

SP is all about freewill. I was once a revolutionary who lost his ideals in technology, a philosopher who lost his integrity in debugging and a poet who lost his soul in coding. SP is just the way I see the world. No hard feelings.

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